I'm tired of the term "stay at home mom".
More importantly I'm really annoyed by the connotations that come with it. We are at the cusp of a new year and yet the politics of this country don't seem to be the only thing going in reverse.
There are numerous blogs and articles flooding the internet these days about how amazing SAHMs are, and how much they do, and how little they are valued..blah blah blah. Yet day in and day out, the same people who read these articles and say "wow, that's so true", are the same people that continue to devalue these moms simply because they don't work.
Work. That's a funny word. Apparently it only happens outside the house it seems because anything at home simply can not be called work. The picture above is of gingerbread men, hearts, trees, and pieces i measured and cut to build a house. After a week of school drop offs and pick ups, doctor visits, grocery shopping, Christmas shopping, little gym classes and laundry, I spent Saturday night, after putting my children to sleep making this dough from scratch, and packing it to rest in the fridge. The next day I baked two cakes to prep for an order and stood at my counter rolling out, cutting, chilling and baking my dough while I looked over at my husband enjoying football Sunday as our kids played and rolled around on the floor around him. I had to stop about 3 times to nurse my daughter, but about 2.5 hours later all the pieces were done and left to cool. Right after this we took our daughter to Chuckee Cheese to get that absurd, never ending, toddler energy out. I'm not gonna lie - I'm really good at the games at CC. So obviously I got to be the parent that had to play all the games, again still on my feet. We grabbed dinner on the way home, ate, and each took a daughter hoping bedtime wouldn't be an ordeal. After I got the baby to bed I was back in the kitchen working on my cake ball orders for the next day. It was really the only time I had as after my husband left for work in the morning I only had a few hours to shower, get ready, and clear up for my gingerbread decorating playdate.
And that my friends, was my weekend. But no, I didn't do any 'work'.
Let's be real, the dialogue really needs to change. If I hired someone to do everything I did for my children she would be called the 'nanny' and when she left her house she would have been leaving for 'work'. Same amount of energy, attention and dedication as me plus a whole bucket of respect for 'working'. It really makes less and less sense the more examples you think of. But anyways, I love everyday I get to enjoy my children and see them grow, and am grateful I can be home and do that. I'm not asking for a medal, or an award or some pedestal to be propped on for every thing I do. But I think the one thing all the exhausted (but very happy!) moms need is simply respect, and consideration.
And that begins with a title change.
The dialogue needs to even the balance between all mothers, those who work in and outside the house. We all face our own battles that challenge us in different ways, but ultimately we all share one common goal - to be a good mother. The era of the stay at home mom has passed - starting today I'm giving myself a new title that truly identifies what I am and what I do every day.
I'm the OTHER working mom.